The Woman Who Comes Back

A couple of weeks ago, I was catching up with a former colleague and friend who had recently started working with me as she prepared to return from her first maternity leave.

Before she left, she knew exactly who she was at work, what drove her, and where she was headed.

But as we talked, it became clear that returning to work wasn't really the challenge.

The challenge was that the person coming back wasn't the same person who had left.

The things she used to want didn't feel quite as important anymore. Some of the ways she'd always approached work no longer felt right either.

Then this week, I welcomed another woman into my coaching program who had recently walked away from a prestigious role at Microsoft.

On the surface, their situations couldn't have looked more different.

But both were running into the same question:

What do you do when your life changes... and your identity changes with it?

WHAT

I call this Identity Disruption.

It's the moment when the version of you that created your current life is no longer the version of you living it.

From the outside, everything can look fine. Your career is working, your title makes sense.

Your next move seems obvious. But internally, something feels off.

Decisions that used to feel straightforward suddenly feel complicated.

Goals that once motivated you lose their pull.

The path that made perfect sense five years ago starts to feel surprisingly difficult to commit to.

And when that happens, the challenge isn't figuring out what to do next.

It's recognizing that the person asking the question has changed.

WHY

Most of us make career decisions based on who we are at a particular point in our lives.

The challenge is that life keeps moving.

The woman who said yes to the promotion at 32 may not want the same things at 42.

The person who built a career around achievement may eventually find herself wanting more space, flexibility, or meaning.

A new life chapter has a way of changing your perspective.

And when that happens, it can feel confusing because nothing is necessarily wrong.

In fact, from the outside, everything might look exactly as it should.

The role is good, the compensation is great.

Yet something keeps nudging at you.

That's why Identity Disruption can feel so unsettling.

You're not just reconsidering a role, a company, or a promotion.

You're reconsidering a future that once made perfect sense.

HOW

If any of this feels familiar, resist the urge to immediately figure out your next move.

When we're uncomfortable, we tend to jump straight to questions like, Should I stay? Should I leave? Should I start something new?

But those questions can be difficult to answer when you're still operating from an old definition of success.

Instead, I'd encourage you to pause and ask yourself:

If I were designing my career around who I am today, what would I want more of? And what am I no longer willing to sacrifice to get it?

That's often where the clarity begins.

Because Identity Disruption isn't usually a sign that something is wrong.

It's often a sign that you've grown.

And sometimes the real work isn't figuring out what's next.

It's giving yourself permission to stop building for the person you used to be and start making decisions for the person you are now.

IF THIS FEELS FAMILIAR…

Sometimes the hardest part isn't making the decision. It's admitting that what once felt right no longer does.

If that's where you are, I'd love to help.

I offer a complimentary Aligned Intro Call where we'll explore what's really beneath the tension you're feeling right now and what's making it difficult to move forward with confidence.

Whether we decide coaching is the right next step or not, you'll leave with a few new insights and a clearer understanding of what this next chapter could look like.

Because sometimes the question isn't:

"What's next?"

It's:

"What fits the person I've become?"

Until next week,

Jaspreet